How to Deprogram a Diva

A few summers ago, my husband announced that it was time to “deprogram” The Diva and based on his statement I figured he was just the guy to do it.  No…nice try (that’s a good guess though), but I’m not the diva who needed to be deprogrammed.  He was referring to a much smaller person~ our 11-year-old daughter.

That was five years ago and as much as I hate to admit it, The Diva Deprogramming Operation has been, by most accounts, a complete failure.

Note:  You cannot deprogram a diva.  A diva must deprogram herself.  

There are several characteristics, definitions and acronyms used now-a-days to describe a diva and most of them are negative.  Trust me, I don’t take great pride or pleasure in saying that I’ve raised a diva, but as the saying goes, ‘If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck…’ well you know the rest.


I won’t take all the credit; therefore, I won’t take all the blame either.  As a family, we collectively created a diva friendly environment.

Always giving just one more chance…

“Can I have?”

A little more time…

Extra (insert desired item here)…

Fewer chores. No chores at all.

First pick.  Last pick.

You name it.  She got it.

Note: A diva isn’t made, she’s born.  She just needs to be awakened!

As I mentioned earlier, we were unsuccessful in our attempt to deprogram The Diva, but we did deprogram how we responded to The Diva’s behavior. First to go were the constant reminders, the personal time keeper and scheduler.  The Diva must develop better time management skills, or she will miss out on the things she wants to do.

Long gone is the valet and personal organizer.  The Diva must keep her things situated in a manner that will, for instance, help prevent the embarrassment of wearing the same outfit twice in one month.  This will also decrease the amount of time and money that is spent looking for and replacing lost items.


Note:  A diva’s way of life is supported by enablers.

Unfortunately, most enablers are friends and family who love her and often justify The Diva’s over the top personality and dramatics.  Only time will tell if The Diva has decided and begun to deprogram herself.  The Diva must learn to do what others have done for her without complaint.  However, I won’t be holding my breath.  It is such a charmed life.

I’m Just Sayin’…(Damn!)

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